Grace
by Magdalena2
Summary: AU. What if Zangan never rescued Tifa from the Nibelheim reactor?How will these new circumstances change and shape her, as she spends 5 years in Hojo's care?Eventually SxT
1. Default Chapter

Oh, Time. Wait in the fore...  
  
It was a humid, grey morning in Midgar, not that that was anything spectacular. The weather tended to stay the same here, below the plate, anyway. Even on the brightest days the soft dappled light of the sun never managed to find its way down here and the populace existed in a sort of perpetual dusk, lit only by the harsh yellow glow of artificial light.  
  
It was early when I wandered in to the sector seven stations. Tired and hungry, I wanted nothing more then to present my report and retreat to a nice, relaxing bath. But unfortunately for me, life was never quite that simple. My life, anyway.  
  
Two SOLDIERS walked in front of me, the epitome of discipline, marching onward like good little mindless automatons, even after we'd been on our feet travelling for nearly seventy-two hours. I don't know who I was to throw stones though, my feet had started to ache and I'd felt fatigue come upon me like a black cloud a couple of hours ago, but my shoulders were pulled back and my chin was up; a challenge to anyone who dared approach Shinra's best.  
  
I spotted the stationmaster lurking on the edge of the platform, eyeing us with apprehension. I gestured for him to come over to us and he came, but his unwillingness dogged his every step. He shuffled to a stop in front of me, eyes averted from the SOLDIER'S watchful gaze. His reaction surprised me slightly, I didn't think of myself as someone who incited fear as they went about their day-to-day duties. Oh well, maybe I was just having a bad day.  
  
Of course, there was always the option that he'd heard of me, but my reputation wasn't so great that I was recognised and feared on sight; I wasn't well known like Sephiroth had been. Shinra had learned from their previous mistakes and kept the star member of SOLDIER out of the limelight, just in case I decided to go crazy too and burn a town to the ground. What's that old saying? Oh yeah, once bitten, twice shy. Besides, I did try to disguise what I was. I never left headquarters without donning a pair of black sunglasses to hide the characteristic otherworldly eyes that marked someone as a SOLDIER. With them, I looked like one of the mercenaries that were common outside of Midgar. A member of SOLDIER is a startling thing to look at, and I was less ordinary then most. The contrast between skins the colour of pale moonlight, a wealth of ebony hair and eyes that glowed a deep, burgundy red tended to disturb people. Most felt my eyes were far too close to the colour of blood; a bad omen. I didn't know if the colour was natural or caused by the mako; being the only woman to ever be infused with it, you didn't get a guidebook along with the transfusions.  
  
"What time is the next train going to the upper plate?" The man ceased his intensive study of the cracks in the stonework adorning the station's floor and glanced up at me. His eyes flicked over the sword strapped to my back and the fighting gloves on my hands and they widened just a bit. "5.45, Ms. Uh. Commander..Um.." His discomfort was evident, but I'd already lost interest and I addressed the two SOLDIERS waiting quietly behind the man. "Be ready for the train in 15 minutes." I turned away, not interested in the look that had appeared on their faces, the one that said they wouldn't relax until I dismissed them. I was not interested in observing the tiresome formalities that came with command right now; a first for me. Who says an old dog can't learn new tricks?  
  
Ignoring the stationmaster who skittered ahead of me, occasionally shooting fearful looks over his shoulder; I made my way to a bench on the far side of the platform. It was mostly deserted, except for two men, one lying on the ground and another bent over him, speaking to him quietly. I dropped my pack to the ground and sank onto the bench, my eyes still on the two men. The one huddled on the ground had blonde hair that stuck up in every direction in unruly spikes. He was muttering to himself and oblivious to the other man's attempts to talk to him. This man was more unusual then most, a tall, dark, hulking figure with a massive gun attached to the stump of his right arm. "Are ya alright?" The only response he got was a blank stare. "Come on, talk to me!" I shook my head; his efforts seemed to be in vain. There was obviously something very wrong with the blonde guy, he didn't seem to hear or see anything. He was completely absorbed into his own world. I frowned, studying him more closely. There was something naggingly familiar about him, something that was pulling and teasing on a memory lodged somewhere deep inside my mind. And then suddenly, for no reason at all, I flashed on a picture of Nibelheim burning that I had in my quarters. I thought of those dancing flames, consuming and laughing at any attempts to subdue them and in my head, I heard a voice speaking my name. And the still image in my mind started to move, like someone had decided to press play after leaving something on pause for an age. I saw that shock of blonde hair, a head bent over me, deep blue eyes full of worry and a heartbreaking pain and I felt the searing, burning pain of the scar on my chest, the one I'd gotten when my parents had been murdered.  
  
I stood up sharply. "Is he alright?" The black man glanced up, eyes flicking over my uniform and hardening visibly. He stood up and faced me, towering over me; I looked like a fragile doll beside him. Anyone watching would think he could toss me about and break me in two without breaking a sweat. But then again, appearances have been known to be deceiving. "He's fine. Shinra" he spat the last word at me, now openly hostile. "He jus' had too much to drink, tha's all." I pointedly looked at the blonde man and back to him, refusing to be intimidated. He didn't look drunk to me. "Is he a friend of yours?" I caught the look of surprise that passed across his face while he struggled to conceal it. He scratched the back of his head with the gun arm. "Yeah. Tha's right. He's a pal. I'll get him home now." I watched, impassive as he lifted the blonde man to his feet and slung his arm across his shoulders. As they walked away the blonde man turned to look at me, and I caught a glimpse of glowing blue eyes. I jerked forward involuntarily, as if to follow, but at that moment a train pulled into the station in a rush of steam and whistles and I remembered where I was and what I was doing. Now was not the time to chase after mysterious ex SOLDIERS I recognised from a town where an atrocious incident hadn't officially happened, and that I had never visited.  
  
I picked up my pack and stepped up to the train doors. I paused, my hand resting on the handle and I looked back, where two figures were fast disappearing into the gloom. I watched for a moment longer before turning away and stepping onto the train.  
  
My hands hit the pads with a steady rhythm. My eyes were locked with the cadet's, taking in every involuntary movement in anticipation of where he'd move the pad to next. He slung his arm left and my fist collided with the pad before it had finished moving. I hit the pads in rapid succession, using feet and hands equally, keeping ahead of the cadet easily. This is what I enjoyed most; training and honing my skills to perfection. Apparently I was the best hand-to-hand fighter in SOLDIER, better even then the legendary Sephiroth himself. That fact filled me with pride, I'd worked and sweated long, hard hours for it, forced to train until I'd collapsed on more then one occasion from sheer exhaustion. And I don't get tired easily. But despite all of that, my skill with a sword was still not up to Hojo's standards, not equal to his greatest experiment, and I'd been instructed to practise until he was satisfied. In fact, that's what I was supposed to be doing right now, but quite frankly I didn't feel like it. Give me a good, old-fashioned fistfight over a sword fight any day.  
  
"Tifa." I didn't look up from my training. I knew whom that smug, self- assured voice belonged to. Instead I pivoted on my heel and hit the pad with a spinning kick, pausing, perfectly balanced, to flick my foot out almost nonchantly and send the pad flying into the wall. I waited until it fell to the floor with a satisfying thump before turning to Rufus. I was being petty as hell, but I enjoyed the slightly apprehensive look on Rufus' face so,damn,much.  
  
He was leaning against the doorframe, arms folded and hair artfully arranged to fall carelessly over one eye. He smiled, something that was probably supposed to be seductive and strode over to me. Inwardly I groaned. Outwardly I told the cadet to get rid of the pads and to get out. "Tifa." He repeated." You're looking stunning, as always." He gave me that practised smile again. The one that had probably made thousands of girls melt where they stood. Unfortunately for him, if didn't do squat for me.  
  
Rufus had been hitting on me ever since I'd set foot in this place 5 years ago. My parents had been Shinra executives and I, their only child. As I've said, they'd been murdered and as a result, I was left in the hands of Shinra. Or more specifically, in the tender care of professor Hojo. He'd entered me into the SOLDIER program immediately. At least, that was the story I'd been told. I wouldn't know if it were true or not, I didn't remember it happening. Or anything else that happened before I came here. All I had was my name, Tifa. No last name, and when I'd asked about it I'd been given more treatments and told not to ask any more questions. Yes, having no recollection of my childhood did scare the crap out of me. I'd asked Hojo about it once. He said it was the result of traumatic experiences. This sort of thing had happened before. But it didn't matter who I'd been, I was in SOLDIER now. Shinra was my life. Yada,yada,yada. I hadn't mentioned the vague memory about the SOLDIER in the train station. I'd learned to keep my mouth shut about the past a long time ago.  
  
Rufus reached out a hand to touch my cheek. I knocked his arm away automatically and for a moment, I glimpsed something akin to rage in his eyes, but he masked it quickly. Rufus, pissed off that I wasn't interested in preserving his inflated ego? You bet. He'd become a royal pain in the ass and one day very soon I knew we were going to have it out over his persistence and what he called "my stubbornness". Some days, I just couldn't wait. If he weren't living proof, I'd swear I'd never thought it possible that someone could just not accept that I detested him. Couldn't accept that being the president's son would fail to get him what he wanted. Oh well. You know what they say about only children.  
  
He was slouching now, hands in his pockets and pouting at my rebuke. The image of a hurt, missunderstood little boy. Yeah. Right. "I have a message for you." "Ok." I looked at him expectantly. "Say please." I glared at him. I wasn't in the mood for this crap. "Rufus-" I began warningly, but broke off as a man dressed in a scruffy blue suit, and with blazing red hair appeared in the doorway. "Yo, Teef, the bosses want to see us. There's a meeting upstairs in five minutes." "I'm coming." As I walked out I turned and gave Rufus my sweetest, most sugary smile. "Bye Rufus." He ignored me, busy staring at the doorway with narrowed eyes.  
  
If looks could kill, Reno would be a dead man.  
  
Out in the hallway, Reno had been joined by two others; Rude and Tseng. The former just nodded to me while the latter gave me a preoccupied smile. I smiled back. I like the Turks, they were the closest thing to friends I had in Shinra.  
  
"Hey babe!" that was Reno. "You know you stop my heart whatever you wear, but I don't think the guys upstairs will appreciate the nifty outfit." He motioned to my crumpled black combats and my clinging, midriff baring t- shirt. I pointedly looked Reno up and down and raised my eyebrow. "Reno, honey, you're giving ME crap about informal business attire?" He smiled depreciating and shrugged. "We're going to be late." "Tseng's right, so shut up Reno and let someone tell me what's going on." He clapped his hand to his heart and contorted his face into a look of mock hurt. "Oh you cut me to the quick babe!" I rolled my eyes and started walking in the direction of the elevator. Reno was a joker. It was his best and worst feature. The only thing I'd ever seen him take seriously was his job.  
  
"We weren't told what the meeting is about, but my guess is, AVALANCHE." I stopped smiling as tension filled the air, chasing away the last traces of mirth and good humour. We stepping into the elevator and I pressed the button for the 66th floor. "Did you know anyone who died?" I shook my head." No. You know how Hojo feels about that." I paused, briefly. "Using bombs. The cowards." We rode the rest of the way up in silence.  
  
The meeting room (and I use the term "room" loosely) was designed to be intimidating. It was needlessly large and ridiculously lavish. I hated it.  
  
President Shinra sat at the head of the massive oak table, with Palmer and Reeve on either side of him. Palmer was an incompetent idiot. God only knows how he'd gotten to be head of his department. Reeve, on the other hand, well, I like Reeve. He's a genuinely nice guy, but in his own way, his status in the company was in just as much question as Palmer's. One didn't get to be one of the top Shinra executives by handing out lollypops. Hojo was pacing, as he usually did. A ball of manic, nervous energy, he never sat at meetings and only nodded to me briefly as I entered the room. The Turk's took their place beside Heidegger and I sat at the edge of the group; conscious of Scarlett's malevolent stare. I knew her dislike wasn't personal, at least not much; it was more to do with the fact that I was young, and female, and currently, the apple of the president's eye.  
  
"Avalanche." the president spoke softly and everyone turned to listen. "That group has become a thorn in my side. I want them gone. They have already sentenced themselves to death. All you need to do is figure out a method."  
  
"We know where they're based, sir." The president's eyes fixed onto Reno. "Go on." "Sector 7.A bar there. We're not sure of the exact location but we know it's in that sector." I felt a chill run through my veins. I thought of the man with the gun arm, and his face when he'd seen my uniform. I opened my mouth to say something, and then promptly shut it. That SOLDIER. Who was he? He was so naggingly familiar and yet I couldn't remember ever having met him during my training. But if I mentioned him now I knew I would never find out who he was, and what was his connection to me. I kept my mouth shut.  
  
They'd moved on with the meeting, my moment of indecision going unnoticed. Reeve was arguing adamantly against something, with Palmer,Scarlett and Heidegger as his opposition. "I just think it's far too extreme, I mean, if Heidegger's plan succeeds the main members will be dead anyway; so why go through with the second plan? Think of the lives that will be lost if you drop the plate!" He slammed his hand down onto the table. "But Reeve." Scarlett chimed in, in her irritatingly breathy voice." you must see that it's necessary. We want to crush all opposition to Shinra and this is the perfect way to do it. If AVALANCHE are blamed then the public will turn against them and they'll see Shinra as their protector!" "You'll be killing many innocent people." I shot a warning glance at Reeve as he opened his mouth to agree with me. The president was watching him with an unsettling intensity that bothered me, to say the least. He slowly closed his mouth. "If AVALANCHE are killed, completely wiped out, then there should be no need to drop the plate. Let's not risk hurting the corporation's image like that." I hesitated, and then plunged on. "If I take care of AVALANCHE then we could put this whole thing behind us. If I fail, we'll ambush them at their next target and we'll still have them. It's a win-win situation. What do you think sir?" I directed my question at President Shinra only, giving the others no chance to object. Their opinions were not the ones that mattered, anyway. He sat and thought for a long, drawn out moment before nodding.  
  
"Tifa. You go and find them. Kill all, and I mean all, of them. If we can do this neatly then we won't drop the plate. Otherwise-" he spread his hands and smiled. "Yes sir." My mouth was dry. Hundreds of people's lives hung in the balance here. AVALANCHE had killed people. It was either them, or innocent people with no blood on their hands.  
  
Scarlett was staring at me, absolutely livid with rage. I stared back, a bored expression on my face. I had no time for Scarlett's sick appetite for suffering and death. "Tseng, find me that Ancient. Professor Hojo is very eager to have her back. No more excuses, just get her." Tseng nodded, but I noticed his mouth had set into a thin hard line. He wasn't happy with the way this meeting was unfolding. But then, who was? "Well, you know what you have to do. Now do it." I stood up and immediately sought out Reno, who was standing in a corner with his fellow Turks. "Anything more specific on their headquarters?" "No. Just sector 7, a bar somewhere near the train station. We've heard rumours, nothing concrete. But they used fake ID's for the train, and they got on, and off, in sector 7. So we're pretty sure." I nodded and turned to leave, my stomach like lead. "And Tifa?" Reno paused, eyes serious. "I knew people, friends who died at the reactor. Kill the bastards." I managed a weak smile before hurrying out the door, as fast as I could go.  
  
I was half way down the corridor when I heard my name being called. I turned and saw Hojo beckoning me over. Fighting down a wave of revulsion, I complied. I'd spent many long and pain filled hours with Hojo, and now being anywhere near him made my skin crawl. He'd transformed me from a weak, scared little girl into somebody lethal; somebody who killed routinely and I hated him for it. Hated how he pushed me to be equal to a dead general, hated how I wasn't a person to him, I was an experiment. I remember how he'd watch detachedly as the mako injections did their worst to me. He made notes while I trembled and passed out and vomited. Oh yes, I had a bone to pick with Hojo, but not today. Not today.  
  
You're probably asking yourself why I don't leave if I hate it so much. And the answer is so pathetic and clichéd that I almost can't admit it to myself; I have nowhere else to go.  
  
Hojo was peering over the tops of his glasses, a habit that had always unsettled me, ever since I was young. "How did your training go?" "Fine, professor." I'd learned to school my face into a polite, expressionless mask a long time ago, and it was that mask that I slipped into now. "Good. You need to be stronger. When you're finished tonight come down to the lab. I want to do some tests." I nodded, not trusting myself to speak. The lab was the one place in the building that truly scared me. Hojo was given free rein to conduct what amounted to torture in that place, and every day I pitied the poor, Ancient girl he'd been after for months and thanked god that she'd taken his attention away from me. I do admit it; my fear of Hojo shamed me.  
  
In the early years, the lab was my home. I'd experienced first hand what Hojo would do in the name of science and even now, when all I need is occasional check ups, I still break into a cold sweat at the thought of going to the lab. I never know if today is the day he'd become especially creative and the knowledge that I'd be on the receiving end of his intentions haunted me. He'd said as much to me during our time together. I was his guinea pig. Everything that I was could be changed in an instant, if he wished it. Then he'd inevitably mention Sephiroth and that awful, manic laugh would fill the room. It made me sure that he knew exactly why Sephiroth went insane, and that he was constantly wondering what would happen to me.  
  
Author's note: Well that seemed like a good place to leave it. I have chapter 2 pretty much written, so that'll be up soon. Read and review? 


	2. Chapter Two

After speaking with Hojo I'd made my way up to my quarters and locked the door. I wasn't going to begin my mission until night had fallen. Going after AVALANCHE would be easier then. Easier to slip in and out of bars, unnoticed in the bustle of people.  
  
I felt bad about it,to be sure, but I'd made up my mind. I had to do it. The lives of a few could not compare to the lives of many. I knew that, but that knowledge did nothing to quell the queasiness in my gut.  
  
My quarters were simply decorated and quite small, housing only a bed, an oak wardrobe and bookcase, a desk and a chair. I did have my own en suite though,something I was thankful for. There was absolutely no way I'd join the other SOLDIERS in the communal showers. I'd go dirty and unwashed before I went anywhere near there,thanks.  
  
I sat down at my desk and opened the sole folder I'd left resting there. I flicked idly through the report on Nibelheim,skimming pages I'd read countless times. That incident had always interested me, ever since Hojo had mentioned it to me with a peculiar look in his eye. He'd given me this report just last year, while mumbling destractedly about expanding my knowledge.  
  
I turned the page and paused, my eyes drawn to the picture of Sephiroth staring sullenly out at me. I let my hand fall away,letting the report rest on the table. How had someone so great fallen so quickly from grace? One minute he'd been the star of Shinra, a young General who'd nearly singlehandedly defeated Wutai. He was the most powerful fighter in the world..and then, he destroyed a town and disappeared. Presumed dead by many and spoken about at all by few. I wish I'd had the opportunity to meet him, but he was before my time. His disappearance took place around the same time I'd shown up at Shinra, and I'd been living in his shadow ever since. In Hojo's eyes anyway. Not that that particularly bothered me. Sephiroth was a fascinating man, and he had done great things. I wouldn't begrudge him that. To even be considered half the SOLDIER that he had been, that contented me.  
  
I remember, one night three years ago I'd gotten so curious that I'd broken into Hojo's office in an effort to find out what treatments Hojo had given him. Unfortunately, instead of using a name for the treatments, each one was coded. Needless to say, it hadn't helped me much. But one thing I'd noticed was that I'd gotten basicly the same treatments as he'd had, only he'd had them over a greater period of time. I'd been caught by one of Hojo's assistants before i could discover anything else. Hojo had me beaten within an inch of my life for that little escapade.  
  
I started thumbing through the report again,stopping once more when presented with a picture of Nibelheim burning. The town was in flames, and a tall man with flowing silver hair had just turned awayy. Someone had snapped off that picture, before dying of smoke inhalation. Shinra had found the camera virtually untouched by the flames. I leant in closely, nose almost touching the paper in an effort to uncover everything hidden in the picture. I couldn't shake the feeling of familiarity I associated with that picture and it troubled me. It was more then just having studied it again and again. I recognised the houses, and I recognised Sephiroth. I remembered him. I leant back in my seat,tilting my chair back further and further as I pressed the palms of my hands over my eyes, forcing my mind back to the black curtain shadowing my memories until I felt certain I could push through if only I tried hard enough. It could be swept aside and I'd remember everything that had happened before I came to this place. I struggled with my mind for what seemed like hours until finally I came away gasping, my skin clammy with sweat, with the image of a photograph. A photograph incased with such startling clarity that I remembered it like it had been taken yesterday. A young girl, me before the mako treatment standing between Sephiroth and a black, spikey haired SOLDIER. I let my chair fall forward again,the front legs hitting the ground with a thump. "Za.." "Zack." Zack! That was his name! I felt elated, triumph coarsing through my veins for a split second before reality came crashing down on me. I was at Nibelheim. I was there when Sephiroth... But why?Why was I there? Why couldn't I remember?! I flicked forward to the last page,and read the last paragraph, a feeling of forboding growing on me.  
  
_Subjects X,Y, and Z found inside the reactor. X and Y were later moved to the facility in Nibelheim for further study, before returning to headquarters. Subject Z remained at headquarters. For more information see Project JEN04683.  
_  
JEN. That tag had been scattered everywhere in mine and Sephiroth's files. Was I subject Z? There was a small chance that it was just plain coincidence, of course, but I didn't think it was likely. The time frame fit perfectly with my arrival at Headquarters, and I couldn't remember ever having journeyed to Nibelheim.  
  
I slammed my hand down on the desk in frustration. Even this new information did nothing to lift the block in my memories, no matter how hard I tried. That was the problem with Retrograde amnesia, you couldn't force yourself to remember. If my memories were to ever come back then they'd come in their own sweet time, I just had to be patient.  
  
Darkness was pressing against the windows, and I was faced with a difficult choice. Carry on with the mission and afterwards make Hojo tell me what was going on, or cut my ties with Shinra and find that SOLDIER and get the information from him. It was more likely that Hojo knew exactly what had happened,but from my brief recollection in the trainstation I'd concluded from the expression on his face that he'd known me, known who I was before all this had happened. It all came down to what I wanted to know more, and my indecision in that regard could very well paralyse me. How could I possibly choose between the knowledge of who I'd been and the knowledge of what Hojo had done to me?  
  
Or.. maybe it wasn't such a difficult choice after all. I mean, why couldn't I do both? If this SOLDIER was a part of AVALANCHE then he wasn't known to Shinra, or else it certainly would have been mentioned. On the off chance that he had joined them Shinra's ignorance to his existance might very well provide me with the chance I needed. Aslong as the other members were dead, who was to say he had any connection to them at all? I was almost certain that the man with the gun arm was connected to AVALANCHE, and if I found him,I'd find the SOLDIER. I could speak to Hojo later, and still complete the mission. I smiled. Who says I couldn't have my cake and eat it too?

* * *

I studied myself critically in the mirror before adding a slight touch of lipstick. My hair was unbound and flowed freely down to my hips, adding to the idea that I was just a normal girl,out on the town. yYup,nothing out of the ordinairy here. I wore black knee high boots, a black skirt that fell to just above my knee and a black polo neck. No jacket, it was rarely cold beneath the plate. The plate blocked most winds from ever reaching the citiy's underbelly. Apart from my ever present fighting gloves I looked almost normal. Luckily for me, wering sunglasses, even in the pitch dark,ws in at the moment. That was the one time I ever found myself aknowledging and even thanking the fashion gods.  
  
I left my room and took the elevator to the first floor,tapping my foot impatiently as I decended. Why Shinra felt the need to make such ridiculously large buildings I'll never know.  
  
I was on the train heading below the plate in no time, finding a seat at the very back next to a window,so I could ignore the leering glances from the male occupants of the carriage. With a jolt the train pulled out from the station and I settled back and watched as the train left the starlit opper plate and descended into the mechanical purgatory of the lower plate. As you can probably tell,I don't approve of what Shinra had done in Midgar at all.I despised the blatant segregation of the immensely rich from everyone else. In my view it was absurd what Shinra had done; turning things like seeing the sky and feeling the wind on your face into expensive privileges instead of a basic freedom. Everyone should be able to look out their window and watch trees swaying softly in the breeze, or to step outside and feel the soft glow of the sun warm their skin. But Shinra had succeeded in making a profit out of that too. Frankly, I didn't understand why the people below the plate accepted it so readily. I didn't understand why the majority still supported Shinra, why they didn't realise how surreal and ridiculous the situation really was. Their lack of spirit and drive exasperated me to the point where I was almost sympathetic to AVALANCHE. If they succeeded in snapping the population out of their monotonous stupor and gave them life again then maybe theirs was really a worthy cause. Even if they murdered people in the process. People who were guilty only of trying to make a living. Well,the end justifys the mean,right? I shook my head in disgust. No matter what the improvement the people of the slums might experience if AVALANCHE succeeded, it still didn't change the fact that they were terrorists. The train pulled into sector seven station and I joined the throng of people crowding the exits of the carriage.  
  
I stepped out onto the bustling platform and tried unsuccessfully to avoid being swept up in the tide of the chattering crowd. A couple of failed attempts later, I just let myself be carried along, listening in spite of myself to the snatches of conversation that floated my way.  
  
"I'm almost a half hour late!Jeremy will kill me.." "What are you up to tonight? I hear that the girls are all heading down to Barmondo.." "He can talk all he wants,another day like that and I'm quiting,I don't care what anyone says.."  
  
For a moment I felt a deep resentment towards these people, the very ones I'd been damning because they didn't fight to make things better for themselves. They didn't realise what they had, how precious it was to only be concerned with mundane, everyday details and not have to deal with violence and death on an everyday basis. I longed for what they had, resented them because they didn't realise how lucky they really were.  
  
"I'm heading to Seventh heaven later,you coming? You have got to see the freak Barret turned up with on Wednesday. Doesn't talk to no one,cept Barret and his little girl."

"Sure Barret's an oddball himself, makes sense that he'd start bringing 'em home. Don't see why I should go outta me way to see this one."

"This one's a real strange one,though. Got these freaky blue eyes, like one of them SOLDIERS,ya know?"  
  
I looked up sharply, eyes searching for the speaker. I spotted him almost immediately, a guy in his mid thirties, talking to a man about 10 years his junior wearing the faded uniform of a Shinra construction worker. I pushed my way towards them, ignoring the protestations I left in my wake.  
  
"No way, you're probably just seeing things. Barret would never go near a SOLDIER. Everyone knnows how he feels about Shinra."

"I'm tellin' ya, come by and see for youself."

I drifted off,away from the crowd as the two men walked on,oblivous to my inpromptu eavesdropping. No way. This was just too easy. I shook my head before sauntering up to a young guy,dressed like a wannabe Turk leaning against the wall of a nearby store, his expression vacant as he watched the crowd go by. I needed to get directions to seventh heaven.

* * *

The bar was fairly empty when I walked in. A small group of men sat at a table on the corner,glancing up at me briefly before turning back to their beers.  
  
A young man dressed in an odd assortment of mismatched army clothes with a mop of black hair was standing behind the bar,chatting away to a little girl sitting on the counter. I walked up to them and sat down on one of the stools.

"Hiya. Welcome to Seventh Heaven. So,what'll it be?"

I skimmed over the faded drinks list pinned to the wall behind him. "Give me...A black russian."

"No problem, it's coming right up."

As I settled myself back onto my stool to wait I noticed the little girl was staring at me.I smiled. "Hi there."

She considered me for a moment,before turning around to face me. "Hello." She said shyly. "What's your name?"

I hesitated for a second."My name's Tifa,what's yours?"

"I'm Marlene. I'm helping Biggs with the bar." She added proudly.

I bit back a laugh. She was adorable! "That's very nice of you, Marlene. I bet without you Biggs wouldn't know what to do,huh?"

She giggled and shook her head.

"Here you go,lady." Biggs passed me my drink. "That'll be four gil." I pulled out five from where I'd tucked my money into my boot.

"Keep the change." He nodded his thanks to me as I took a sip of my drink.

"Tifa?"

"Yes Marlene?"

"Why do you wear sunglasses? It looks kinda weird!"

I paused, and noticed Biggs trying not to look like he was listening to my every word. "Well I like them."

"Oh.. Well... Ok."

I glanced at Biggs again, and decided to risk it." So Marlene, where's your dad got to?I know Biggs needss your help, but it's kinda late for you to be up,don't you think?"

"Oh he's off with Mr.Cloud talking to the guys in the weapons shop. That's where they go to have grown-up fun. Besides I'm a big girl now,I can stay up late if I want. Daddy says so!"

Biggs started towards me. "Excuse me, Ms-"

He was interupted by the door to the bar banging open and a man bellowing "Ok!Everybody out!Bars closed!Get your asses home now!" I turned around to look as grumbling, the rest of the patrons made their way to the door, past the watchful eye of the man from the trainstation.

"Daddy!Daddy!" Marlene jumped off the counter top and ran over to the man, Barret, I assumed. He swept her up in his arms. "Hey,how's my little girl doin?" He caught sight of me, the lone person still in the place,apart from Biggs. "Hey!didn't ya hear me? Bars closed!" Behind him, a man with glowing blue eyes entered the bar.

"Oh daddy,don't be silly!That's Tifa! She's a really nice lady." Barret eyed me suspiciously.

"Still honey,bar's closed. You know that." The ex-SOLDIER strode forward, grabbing hold of my arm as I stood up. I could feel my heart beating madly, echoing around my head like a drum. "Tifa?" He leaned closer. "Tifa... Is it really you?I...I thought you were dead." I stared up at him,frozen as he reached forward and plucked my sunglasses away from my face. Here was the man who could answer all of my questions and I wasn't even able to form words. I was paralysed, staring up into his face,remembering a younger version of this man, talking me while we sat on top of a well. Telling me he was going to join SOLDIER.

"..Cloud?" His eyes widened,when he saw the mako glow in my eyes. Unfortunately,he wasn't the only one who noticed. Barret pushed Marlene to the side,telling her to stay under the table. She complied, whimpering in fright.

"Shit!It's a %&$£ SOLDIER! Biggs,Cloud get the hell away from her!" He raised his gun arm. Cloud looked towards Barret,confused.

"No,wait Barret-" I didn't give him a chance to finish. I rolled my wrist,jerking free from his grip as I punched him in the jaw,sending him reeling. I went like a shot,running for the door, Marlene's plaintive wails chasing me out,before they were replaced with the sharp rat-tat-tat of Barret's gun arm. I dodged,throwing myself into a front roll through the door of the bar. Once I was outside I ran around the side and jumped,grabbing hold of the roof of the bar and pulling myself up. I lay on the roof,making my body a flat as I could,to minimalise the chance that they'd seen me. Below me I could hear curses as Barret ran outside after me. He shot a cursory glance around the sides of the bar before he was off,running in the direction of the pillar.  
  
I lay,tense for what seemed like hours before I heard him come back in again.

"I lost the stupid £$%." He slammed the door behind him.  
  
I relaxed and silently leapt back onto the ground.Well, I thought ruefully. That went well.  
  
_Authors note: Well that took longer than expected.I know I said I'd have it up really soon,but I was struck down with all sort of catastrophes,honest! First I lost where I'd written this chapter,so I had to re-do it. Then I got really sick and couldn't write anything. And THEN I messed up my hand really badly when I was fire spinning and so I've had to type everything one handed.But I got there in the end. Thanks for all the nice comments! Will Tifa leave Shinra for avalanche?...I'm not telling! You'll see. Next chapter will be good. I promise. Pairing is Seph and Tifa,because I love that pairing and I'm obsessed with writing a believable fic about them. I know the format is a bit messed up,I don't know why that keeps happening but I'll try to fix it later. And I will,of course watch my tenses(wow,the jack of spades reviewing my fic!heehee!).Thanks everyone! Read and review!_


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